Step 3: Making the Decision
Step 3 — Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.
Surrender. I decided to stop running the show and hand my will and my life over to the care of God, as I understand God.
Step three is a decision, not a feeling. Running life on self-will — managing, controlling, keeping score — is exhausting, and it's what kept the drink necessary. Here you fire yourself as general manager of the universe. Many people mark this decision out loud with someone they trust; it tends to stick better that way.
What to read alongside Step 3
📚 Companion reading: Big Book chapter 5 (How It Works), through the end of the step-three discussion around page 63.
The program's directions, and the decision at the center of them.
What working Step 3 looks like
These are the reflection questions 1more24 asks you at this step. The answers underneath are written examples — one person's, invented for this page.
List three times running things your way made everything worse — for you and for the people standing nearby.
Self-centeredness wears costumes: control, people-pleasing, self-pity, resentment, fear. Which costumes are yours?
Invented, not anyone's real writing — and it couldn't be. Every member's journal is encrypted with their own password, so this application cannot read a single word of it. Step 3 asks 3 more questions once you're signed in.
Working Step 3, not just reading it
1more24 gives this step a private journal, reflection questions written for it, and a companion who knows where you are in the work. Everything you write is encrypted with your own password — nobody else can read it, not even us. Free and open to all.